When you don’t know what to say

I haven’t written in weeks…at least not here. I don’t know what to say. God has been showing himself and I have been keeping notes in my notebook and journal. He is showing himself in the trials of others and showing me where I haven’t completely healed or surrendered in the process. Another faith walk. Carrying a heavy load at times. There are stories and beautiful testimonies, but they are not mine to share.

This morning, I woke up with a throbbing headache for the second day in a row. The puppy was bouncing around the bed trying to get my attention  (he is absolutely insane!) and down the hall I could hear quite a commotion. I pulled myself out of bed and made my way down the hall. As I turned the corner, I saw two little heads pushed wpid-20140305_063807.jpgtogether. I made my way to the coffee pot and could hear him trying to lead her to Romans 6:11-12. He was showing her the numbers and helping her sound out words…he began to read. Next, he moved to the maps in the back of their Bibles. As he traced the red line with his finger, he lead her on the journey from Egypt, across the Red Sea and to Mount Sinai…telling the story all the way. Keep in mind, this was not a quiet exchange. He spoke loudly as he tried to keep her attention, there was giggling, squealing, singing and some amount of frustration on his part as he tried to keep the limited attention of a four year old at 6:45am. As I sat down at the table next to them, she shot out of her seat holding her Bible high above her head and shouted, ” Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path and I hide it in my heart!” and she scampered off. I guess “quiet time” was over for her.

I looked at my hubby -who was desperately trying to focus on the scripture he was reading – and said “I needed this.” He chuckled and looked at me as if he detected a hint of sarcasm. After all, I woke up with a headache and this house was anything but quiet this morning. All sarcasm aside…this spirited exchange as our seven year old son tried to teach our four year old daughter lifted my heart way beyond my throbbing head this morning. It was the breath of fresh air that I had been waiting for. As I opened to Psalm 65 it was easy to see that God was pointing me to the simple blessings today.

The whole earth is filled with awe at your wonders; where morning dawns, where evening fades, you call forth songs of joy. You care for the land and water it; you enrich it abundantly. The streams of God are filled with water to provide the people with grain, for so you have ordained it.  You drench its furrows and level its ridges; you soften it with showers and bless its crops. You crown the year with your bounty, and your carts overflow with abundance. The grasslands of the wilderness overflow; the hills are clothed with gladness. The meadows are covered with flocks  and the valleys are mantled with grain; they shout for joy and sing.

Psalm 65:8-13

When I started this blog, my intention was to share with you how God interacts with me daily…even in the seemingly mundane moments. To grow and serve and thrive- to live the abundant life available to me right where I am. I am planted in this home, with my hubby, two kids and two dogs. I am planted in my community, with a few dear women at Bible Study on Tuesday night, and in the company of some preschool moms during the week. God doesn’t only show himself in a in a grandiose bolt of scriptural revelation or through the victory of a trial. While those moments and experiences are tremendous blessings and result in powerful testimonies- we must remember that He is present also in the little things… like the interactions of two small kids at the breakfast table in a little home in rural America. My carts overflow with abundance! I am blooming here – growing.  And there is fruit.

When I crawled out of bed this morning with that headache pounding like a bass drum. I had a song in my head. “Just say Jesus” by 7eventh Time Down. There are many, many people in my little life who need prayer. The needs are many and the spectrum of those needs is even more vast. Sometimes I don’t know what to say…to them…on this blog…or to God when I am praying. Romans 8:26-27 reminds me that

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God.

Count your blessings today and remember, when you don’t know what to say…Just say Jesus. Take a listen and enjoy.


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